Knowing How To Give Up Is Essential To Get Well
It’s no exaggeration to say that a good part of our well-being depends on knowing how to give up. The term “give up” certainly generates aversion in many people. It is no wonder. We live in a culture that constantly invites us to obtain and accumulate, not to give up.
Consultations with psychologists are filled with people who cannot be satisfied with the reality in which they live. Many of them are surprised to have achieved much of what they set out to do. It could be a good job, some amenities, or a stable spouse. The options can indeed be numerous. They don’t feel well despite everything.
The key may not be what we need to get. It is possible that the solution to this eternal dissatisfaction lies in knowing how to give up. To strike a balance between enthusiasm for getting what we dream of and compliance for appreciating what we have.
A time of discomfort
We all have in common the desire to be well. And when we are good, we are better. This is a kind of positive nonconformity. She finally allowed us to co nstruire the knowledge, science and civilizations. We want to solve the problems posed by reality to be better, always better …
However, “to obtain” and “to be ” have become practically synonymous today. What we are depends on what we get. “To be someone” means to get recognition, money, prestige, fame, or whatever. The point is, it is these appendices that give weight to whoever owns them. We are nobody if we do not have what puts us above others.
So we live in a time when an epidemic of sadness seems to be spreading. It is not trivial that the rates of mental disorders have increased in recent decades. Or that most people complain about their lives.
Knowing how to give up
An important part of everything is that life always pushes us to multiple renunciations. Almost every day. If we do one thing, we stop doing another. So we have to choose. If we want a big and wonderful house, we will probably have to leave our family alone to put more effort into our work. If we want a stable spouse, we have to give up the men or women who come through our lives.
It is about what many do not understand, or do not want to accept. They assume that true well-being can only be achieved when we get everything at the same time. Knowing how to give up is not one of our options. Quite the contrary. We want to know how to get, how to accumulate, how to collect the full set.
The lie resides here. Every decision we make in life involves resignation. Any achievement obtained has its price. It is not possible to have it all. Each person nevertheless defines their priorities. This is why knowing how to give up is fundamental.
Happiness is inside
We are mistaken in thinking that we will be happier if we get this without losing that. This is because we want the full package and we can get miserable when we don’t get it. We aspire to what we give up instead of enjoying what we get through that renunciation. We always choose. But we are often unaware of it.
We may end up getting angry with ourselves for not embodying this ideal of “being”, which we don’t even build. We then begin to abuse ourselves and to demand of ourselves. Better work, higher status, perfect harmony within the couple, model children, etc. Since ideals are ideal precisely because they are not in concrete reality, we make our life hell because of what we do not have.
It is certain that we are either happy with little or we are not happy. This voracious anxiety about having more or being more ceases when we find an internal balance. However, this is only possible if we have acquired the capacity to know how to give up. Happiness is an attitude strong enough to identify what really matters and pursue it, thereby giving up the rest without nostalgia.
Our thoughts Knowing how to give up at the right time is one of the keys to being able to move forward and make room for new things in your life.
