How To Overcome The Addiction To The Need For Recognition
Start by talking to yourself, acknowledging your thoughts, validating your opinions, even if you think it’s not at all what others may think of as valid or relevant.
Practice your way of expressing yourself without offending others, but respecting yourself, giving free rein to your ideas and personal aspirations. Don’t let your need for recognition skew your thinking. What other people think shouldn’t be your primary concern, especially if their ideas go against your interests.
You can please others without having to betray yourself. If you don’t say what you mean, you are giving those around you plenty of time to manipulate you. This is absolutely not the right way to earn their respect.
2 – start by approving yourself
Always looking for the approval and validation of others means that you are perpetually concerned about the bad opinion that those around you might develop of you. It makes you vulnerable and makes you a perfect victim to those close to you with bad intentions.
It totally harms your creativity, your zest for life, your kindness and your spontaneity.
You have to start by recognizing yourself, validating yourself and approving yourself. Be proud of yourself. Don’t wait for the world to applaud each of your decisions with both hands. It is not in any case to be selfish, on the contrary. A person who is proud of themselves and who feels good is more useful to others because they are happy and know exactly where to go.
3 – Your decisions will always be disappointed
The need for recognition is a feeling that prompts us to try to gain and maintain a sense of control. If we can make the people around us happy, we imagine that we can be too, because we will not be rejected or abandoned.
But there is no way you can control the thoughts of others, or please everyone. Whatever you do, you will always be disappointed or dissatisfied. We are not perfect beings who can act in tune with the entirety of their environment and their fellows.
4 – focus on the real and be yourself
The group mentality or, to put it better, the herd instinct, can lead us to form misconceptions about what we are supposed to do, about what is mostly accepted by the group.
In order not to swim against the tide, many people act in contradiction to their ideals or their passions.
These behaviors can build, in the long term, a dynamic that totally alienates us from others, which can make us lose our whole personality and disintegrate our ability to make decisions.
From now on, focus on what you think is right, analyze your own philosophy, and set your own goals.
If you don’t like the mainstream of the group you belong to, why try to indulge in it? What interest would you have in being part of such a circle?
5 – don’t assume labels that others stick to you
We are sometimes so preoccupied with our need for recognition that we are convinced, without even thinking about it, that those around us have stuck this or that label on us.
However, most of the people around us don’t have such radical ideas or judge others in the blink of an eye, as they are primarily trying to figure out their way of being and see what they can. bring to the rest of the group.
People who try to convince you that they are right may also have this universalist reasoning. Just because they don’t think like you doesn’t mean that they don’t feel affection for you and that they don’t think your differences are real wealth.
Being in harmony with yourself and telling others what you think is the best way to gain the respect of the social group you are a part of.
If we put labels on you that do not correspond to you, it is because the whole of this group does not correspond to you.
